IT’S OKAY TO FEEL LIKE THIS

IT’S OKAY TO FEEL LIKE THIS

IT’S OKAY TO FEEL LIKE THIS

We all have our down days. Some days feel like they go on forever.

Sometimes it feels like ground-hog day and we feel pretty damn unfulfilled. Then the guilt creeps in and we beat ourselves up for feeling this way because we love our children, but we don’t get ‘everything we need’ by ‘just being a Mum.’

It’s okay – you can say it.
I have these days too.

The days when you feel disconnected from yourself, your partner, and pretty much everything.
The days when you can’t seem to pull yourself out of the brain fog. The exhaustion. The heaviness.
The days when you feel so much anxious energy charging through your body, you feel like what you really need is to throw a tantrum like a toddler and cry for approximately 5 days.

It’s okay.

Forgive yourself for being human. For having these thoughts. For feeling this way. It’s okay.

Allow yourself to flow with what is coming up for you, and breathe.

Cry. Scream. Reach out.

I see you, Mumma. You are not alone. You are magnificent.

You pick others up when you have nothing left. You pick others up when you can’t even pick yourself up.

The moment you decide to forgive yourself for not having all your shit together all the time, is the moment you are free. Flow with it.

It really is okay.
I’ve got you, Mumma.

Reach out for a virtual coffee if you feel to and I will hold space for you: www.calendly.com/bethlewis/coaching

DO YOU EVER FEEL LONELY?

DO YOU EVER FEEL LONELY?

DO YOU EVER FEEL LONELY?

Do you ever have that feeling of emptiness inside you even though you’re in a house full of people, or sitting with your partner?

Me too.

Being alone doesn’t mean you don’t have people in your space.

It means you don’t have space for yourself.

Let me explain. Let’s drop deeper!

Sitting with the stirring feeling that there is something missing, is generally an indication that you have disconnected from who YOU truly are.

Recently, following a series of personal challenges, I had been feeling restless and sad. This uneasy feeling started showing up everywhere and I started doubting EVERYTHING.

I felt disconnected from my partner because when you’re already hurting you just want to look at the person who is ‘meant to get you more than anyone’ and say “FIX IT!”

How frustrating is it when they can’t!!??

I found myself getting frustrated over the smallest things in my relationship and little things became big things very quickly.

What did I do?

After a massive cry, I took a breath. Then went inward.

I gave myself permission to feel the way I felt and I let myself sit with this feeling.

Tears fell.

I put one hand on my heart and one on my belly.

I realised in that moment, that the connection and harmony I was craving (that I didn’t feel my partner ‘giving to me’) was up to me to give to myself.

It was up to me to show up in my relationship as the beautiful, divine goddess I know I am. I deserve that.

I do not need to wait for a man to ‘make me feel this way.’

Nor do I need a man to complete me – because I am already complete.

I felt a sense of power and harmony return to me, because I had taken my power back.

I was back.

My partner began to respond to my peaceful energy and the energy in our home shifted to what I feared had disappeared.

We booked a night away together and had the most phenomenal date night I could’ve hoped for! I fell in love with my man all over again – because I had fallen in love with me again.

He commented on my energy and said he felt a sense of inner peace and softness and that was beautiful.

It is so easy to put power into the way we ‘need’ others to make us feel and forget that we can do this for ourselves.

When we show up for ourselves internally – others show up for us externally.

If you’re feeling disconnected from your partner – book a date with yourself first!

If you’re feeling disconnected from yourself and you’re stuck on how to shift this – book a date with me! I can help.

REMEMBER!

If YOU don’t show up for yourself and DECIDE to make a shift – nobody else will.

Book your complimentary Support Session with me today. Show up for YOU!

THERE WERE 3 IN THE BED

THERE WERE 3 IN THE BED

THERE WERE 3 IN THE BED

Okay, let’s talk relationshit… Whoops! I’m mean RELATIONSHIPS! Or do I?

We all know that having a baby is exhausting and one area of your life this can affect is the relationship you have with your partner.
You’ve gone from being free and easy and only having to consider yourselves, to your relationship being triangulated by this little human demanding all your attention — which can leave one, or both of you feeling neglected. (And in some cases, resentful.)
Finding your feet in this new chapter you’ve entered when you’re sleep deprived and overwhelmed can be incredibly challenging and finding your way back to one another can seem impossible.

Communication really is key!

Talk to one another. Talk about how you’re feeling, what’s coming up for you and what you need.
When you have no energy to talk, a warm embrace is sometimes all you need. The act of physical touch is a powerful thing.

REMEMBER!

When we’re sleep-deprived, our minds can play tricks on us. You can be feeling a lot of negative “things” and the people we’re closest to are the ones we take it out on.
Before you REACT or LASH OUT — STOP, BREATHE, and ask yourself what you’re really feeling below what you’re about to say or react to. Sometimes all you really want to say to your partner is — “I MISS YOU.” So say it.
If you really are struggling and need support in ANY way — ASK! It’s okay not to be okay.

BREATHE

BREATHE

BREATHE

Every time I do or say something I think to myself, “What example am I setting for my son?”
I read a quote recently that resonated with me deeply:
“When little people are overwhelmed by big emotions, it’s our job to share our calm not join their chaos.”
~ L.R. Knost
 
Breathe.
Reset.
Take a moment.
Ask for support.
Talk.
Love.

Practice gratitude.

When you’re sleep deprived, overwhelmed and beyond exhausted, it’s very easy to let your emotions take over. It’s okay! We’re all human and it’s important for our kids to see this too… it’s how we repair after rupturing that will stick with them.

MOTHERS IN-TUITION

MOTHERS IN-TUITION

MOTHERS IN-TUITION

Becoming a Mother can be overwhelming. With SO much information available to us, this can be wonderfully supportive – and a little too much at the same time!

One thing I’ve learnt on this journey so far is that my intuition is usually spot on. Any time I have started to feel stressed, overwhelmed and out of my depth has actually been when I’ve listened to too much advice from others or based my parenting style on what me or my child “should/shouldn’t” be doing.
 
Don’t get me wrong, certain advice and support is imperative when it comes to parenting – it’s what we do with this advice and if it resonates well with us as parents that counts. (If it doesn’t resonate with you as a Mother, your child can feel your energy… remember that.)

This message is for all those new Mums out there “trying to get it right” –
My biggest breakthrough came when I surrendered to being present with my little guy and tuned in to my INtuition. Your intuition is strongest when you’re present and not overwhelmed with how you “should” be doing things. Do what feels right for you and your baby and let go of what you thought it might look like.

“Information is helpful. INtuition is key.”

Anchor to Presence

Anchor to Presence

Anchor to Presence

Becoming a parent is like shining a spotlight on all parts of yourself. It forces you to see where you crave control, love, acceptance, security and order, and it pulls you back into the present moment every time your thoughts or emotions start running away from you.

Remember those days when you woke up in the morning and thought, “today, I’m going to strip the bed, do the laundry, work on my business and exercise” and actually achieve all those things (or even one of them?!)… me neither!

Today I wanted to work on content for my website and get some housework done, however my little man has been a little unsettled… so today, I am still. I’m sitting in my rocking chair, typing this post with one hand, because this beautiful little guy simply wants his Mum.
One of my favourite quotes is “Are you having your thoughts, or are your thoughts having you?” (Amir Zoghi)

Whilst my conditioned adult mind races with thoughts such as “I don’t have time for this,” “I have so much to do,” this is frustrating & I need to get things done,” I choose to be still, thankful and grateful instead. This divine little being is my son and he is growing SO fast. This time with him as a baby doesn’t last long and today, he simply wants his Mum. That is beautiful.

I love you little man… and I am present with you.

SELF LOVE & “YOU” TIME

SELF LOVE & “YOU” TIME

SELF LOVE & “YOU” TIME

Becoming a parent is challenging on many levels and one of the main challenges is finding time for yourself and/or your relationship with your partner.


SO many parents I know struggle with this. How do we find those little moments for ourselves – no matter how big or small they may be.

One thing I love to do for myself is give my baby his last feed on my rocking chair in a dimly lit room, with gentle piano music playing. I take this time to breathe and focus on 3 things I have gratitude for from the day. It’s amazing how something so simple can soothe your soul.

When it comes to my partner, I find presence is key. Take time to turn off the TV and put your phones down and connect. Even if it’s only a few minutes, it’s important to connect with no distractions and tell each other what you appreciate about one another.

Sending love and light to you all and remember — you can’t pour from an empty cup, so fill your cup every chance you get… even if it’s a drop at a time.

Breastfeeding is a journey!

Breastfeeding is a journey!

Breastfeeding is a journey!

I don’t need to explain to any parent how sleep deprivation feels, as anyone who has nursed a newborn baby knows exactly what I’m talking about!

When I first started breastfeeding, my flow wasn’t fast enough and I was using nipple shields to try and help with the pain, however this resulted in my poor little guy sucking so hard that he pulled my entire nipple up the shield and ended up with blisters on his tongue from the friction! He wasn’t putting on weight and we were both in pain when he was trying to feed which was incredibly distressing for us both.

Due to this, I had to learn how to get him to latch on without the shields, push past the pain and do whatever I could to increase my flow. It’s been quite a journey but my little man is thriving and I love the beautiful experience of feeding him. My only issue is that until now, he has been 100% on the breast and isn’t really enjoying taking a bottle which makes it pretty much impossible for me to get any proper rest. (I feel we’re getting there, but it will take some time.)

Being 100% responsible for his feeds is incredibly demanding and today, I am beyond exhausted. My whole body hurts, I feel sick and my eyes are burning.

This post is for all the Mum’s out there who are absolutely shattered, but keep going for the sake of their little ones. Putting our own needs aside to make sure our children are loved, healthy and safe. Some days we simply need someone to tell us that it’s okay to be emotionally, mentally and physically drained. Sometimes we need to fall apart and have a good cry.

It’s okay that we simply can’t do it all. It’s okay to take a moment for you.

To all the Dad’s / loved ones

If you see your partner or a Mum you know “having a moment,” I can pretty much guarantee that all she needs is for you to notice, stop what you’re doing, put your arms around her and say: “Sweetheart, you’re doing a great job. I love and appreciate you.”

And the Mumma’s… take a big deep breath and remind yourself that it’s okay not to be okay. And most importantly — it’s okay to ask for help! Give your partner or a loved one the chance to hold space for you while you say everything you feel you “shouldn’t.” It really is okay.

Embrace the unexpected

Embrace the unexpected

Embrace the unexpected

After spending over 7hrs in emergency following a weekend of feeling horrendous and suffering from abdominal pain, I thought something was really wrong with me. I’d had surgery for endometriosis the previous year and various health issues in the past so naturally my mind was racing with “what ifs.”

Numerous tests and physical exams later, the Doctor looked at me and said, “We need to have a different conversation and I believe congratulations may be in order!”

I remember an instant feeling of WTF, closely followed by a smile. You could have knocked me over with a feather. I looked at my partner and I could tell we were both a little shocked to say the least. (We even laughed and started looking for hidden cameras!)

I remember getting ready for bed that night and placing my hand over my belly. As I felt the emotion rise I said, “I love you already.”

2019 was one of the most emotional years of my life in so many ways and it tested me on every level. In the first year of our relationship, my partner and I faced grief, illness, injury and a “solid nudge” into next steps in our relationship — and it’s all perfect.

Life is full of uncertainty and we are all thrown into unexpected circumstances.

I couldn’t be more grateful for this, as although growth is uncomfortable — if we weren’t challenged, we wouldn’t grow.

3mths ago we welcomed our son into the world! Becoming a Mum has been the most incredible experience of my life and I fall more in love with Hamish and my partner every day.

I have been in a bubble of new bubba-love over the past 12wks so I had not gotten around to doing an official arrival announcement. I wanted to stay present and lap up every delicious moment with our beautiful boy.

Embrace the unexpected. You manifested it, so be present with it.

Say YES to you!

Say YES to you!

Say YES to you!

When we set a goal, decide what we want and start to manifest, there are certain paths to take in order to become the person we need to be to achieve our vision.
These paths are not always pleasant. These paths can be challenging. They will test us to our very core and stir up unhealed parts of ourselves that we need to work on. No, this is not easy… but yes, it’s worth it!
In these moments, we have a choice – we either choose to keep our eye on the target and work through our shit, or we can choose to stay stuck where we are, knowing that our vision will only ever be a dream.
How much do you want your dream? Ask yourself this when your shit comes up and when the “little you” wants to run, remind yourself that YOU manifested this experience to become the person you need to be, to land in your vision.
Saying no to the challenge, is saying no to your dream…
Remember this next time a challenge comes your way. How can you look at this differently?

Passion and Purpose

Passion and Purpose

Passion and Purpose

People talk a lot these days about finding their passion and purpose, and many feel immense pressure to do so. Is my life complete if I haven’t found this thing called “purpose?” What is it anyway?
Your passion and purpose is not necessarily what you DO, nor does it relate to $$! You simply find something you LOVE and DO THAT!
Ask yourself:
  • What sets your soul on fire?
  • What are you doing when you feel calm, peaceful, alive, content etc?
  • Most importantly, ask yourself “What do I LOVE to do?” The most important part of this question is “What do I!” How many of you are on someone else’s goal plan, or living a life you feel you “should” be living because it was the “right path” to choose based on belief systems someone else instilled into you? Did you ever make a CHOICE?
If you’re simply floating on the surface of your life and you’re feeling unsure that this mystical thing called FULFILLMENT actually exists – I’m telling you it does… and the answer is within you. Are you willing to go deeper? Your passion is waiting for you. You already have and are everything you’re craving.
“We lose ourselves in what we think is important in life till we realise feeling alive is all that is truly important.”
~ Jamie Gonzalez

Flow with it.

Flow with it.

Flow with it.

Just flow with it… easier said than done, right?
There are always going to be circumstances in your life that are hard to accept, manage, or process.
My question to you is this:
“What if you truly knew in the depths of your soul that everything was going to be okay, no matter what the current ‘challenge’ is that you’re facing?”
Ponder on this:
  • Would you manage each situation in your life differently?
  • Would you let go of the need to control these situations?
  • How would it feel to have the ability to completely surrender to whatever it is that you’re experiencing, and simply allow it to play out?
You can learn how to flow with whatever comes up for you, instead of sitting with the resistance of it – if you choose to. Some of the most powerful lessons and breakthroughs are in these moments and when we’re too caught up in the ‘drama,’ we can miss them. These lessons will be repeated until we get the learnings.
Learn how to flow, and you will flow to internal freedom.

Courage.

Courage.

Courage.

“Courage doesn’t happen when you have all the answers. It happens when you are ready to face the questions you have been avoiding your whole life.”
Shannon L. Alder
Life seems easy when we feel we have the answers, but what happens when we feel we don’t?
Are you feeling overwhelmed? Lost? Stressed? Anxious? Angry? Depressed?
Are you experiencing the same pattern, time and time again and starting to wonder “WHY ME?”
Know this –
These patterns are generally being repeated for you to EXPERIENCE and FEEL the EMOTION that you are suppressing within yourself and avoiding to feel.
The pattern will continue playing out so you can continue to experience the emotion and the EMOTION IS THE CLUE, so you need to TUNE IN.
Have the COURAGE to listen to what your triggers, patterns and emotions are telling you.
The ANSWER is within YOU! Every situation and person in our lives is a REFLECTION of ourselves and what is going on for us internally.
Find the courage to start shifting, by looking in the mirror and working on YOU.
If you want to find the answers you’re seeking and you want something to change, you must find the courage to ask the right questions. This is where the magic is!

MY COMMITMENT TO MYSELF

MY COMMITMENT TO MYSELF

MY COMMITMENT TO MYSELF

2018 was quite a challenging year for me in regards to my health and I’ve been working very hard on rebuilding my immune system and fitness levels.
Following surgery for endometriosis last year, my immune system seemed to be non-existent which resulted in a few bouts of nasty viruses leaving me feeling exhausted, rundown and sick of being sick!
I feel drawn to share this journey with you as I know we all have our own challenges in different areas of our lives. Nurturing yourself from the inside out is the key!
Here is my commitment for February 2019:
  • no alcohol
  • no dairy
  • no coffee
  • alkaline diet
  • whole grains only
I have a few injuries and live with chronic pain, so easing myself into a great routine is important! I will be doing one of the following activities every day, (as well as stretching and mobility):
  • yoga
  • mat pilates / pilates reformer
  • minimum 30min walk with my pups
I vow to follow this plan, even on the days I don’t want to.
I love myself enough to give myself this gift.
Let’s do this!

Tune In.

Tune In.

Tune In.

Welcome to the beginning of another new year!
It is imperative to give yourself time to rest, recharge and rejuvenate throughout the year.
  • Tune in and listen to what your body, mind and soul are telling you.
  • Take a few moments each day to be grateful for your breath – it’s always there for you.
  • Take time out just for YOU! (We all need time out. Book a massage, plan a self-love day, a mini-break, or a holiday.)
  • Write a ‘Fun & Creativity’ list. (We have enough to-do lists.)
  • Be consciously aware of where you’re placing your attention and energy.
  • Be okay to ‘not be okay!’ Life is not meant to be ‘easy’ and it is not normal to be ridiculously happy all the time! Tune into what your heart and soul are telling you and if you can feel emotion stirring – ‘sit with your shit.’ (There is always a message, a purpose, or a lesson.)
  • Everything you experience is either a reason, a season, or a lifetime.
  • It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey. Be present!
  • Treat your body like a temple and be consciously aware of what you are fuelling yourself with. (This goes for your body, your mind AND your soul!)
  • Remember you already have everything you need within yourself. (Sometimes you simply need a little help finding it.)
  • Work with a coach/mentor who truly inspires you!
“If you’re sacrificing your peace for a future goal, you’re only chasing a goal that is reinforcing the lie that you don’t already have that which the goal will have you feel once obtaining it.”
~ Jamie Gonzalez