emotional regulation Archives

How Breathwork Helps Mums Regulate Stress & Emotions

by Beth Lewis | Apr 30, 2025 | Beth Lewis, Breathwork, Self Care

Motherhood is beautiful, but let’s be honest—it’s also overwhelming. Between sleepless nights, mental load, constant multitasking, and meeting everyone’s needs but your own, it’s easy to feel like you’re always “on.” If you’re living in a constant state of stress, irritability, or exhaustion, your nervous system may be crying out for support.

The good news? You don’t need a complete life overhaul to feel better. One of the simplest and most powerful tools you have is your breath.

Let’s explore why nervous system regulation matters so much for mums—and how breathwork can bring you back to balance.

💛 What Is Nervous System Regulation?

Your nervous system is your body’s internal alarm system. It responds to stress, danger, or demands by activating the sympathetic nervous system—aka your fight, flight, or freeze response. This is great when you’re in actual danger, but not so helpful when the “threat” is spilled cereal or a whiny toddler. (Unfortunately, your nervous system doesn’t know the difference between you being chased by a tiger, or being triggered by your child!)

Nervous system regulation is the ability to move out of that heightened stress state and into the parasympathetic state—the one that supports rest, connection, digestion, and emotional clarity.

When your nervous system is regulated, you feel:

Calm but alert
Emotionally grounded
More patient and less reactive
Able to think clearly and respond instead of explode

🌿 Why It Matters to Mums

Mums are often in chronic stress mode—juggling mental loads, emotional demands, and constant noise. Over time, this can lead to:

Burnout
Anxiety
Emotional outbursts (aka mum rage)
Sleep issues
Exhaustion that coffee can’t fix

Regulating your nervous system isn’t just about feeling “calm”—it’s about helping your entire body function better, from your hormones to your digestion to your mood.

🚨 Signs Your Nervous System Is Out of Balance

If your nervous system is dysregulated, you might feel:

Easily overwhelmed by noise, mess, or demands
On edge or hyper-alert, even when nothing’s wrong
Emotionally reactive—snapping at your kids or crying easily
Unable to relax, even when the house is quiet
Tired but wired (struggling to sleep or wake rested)
Disconnected from yourself and your body

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. You’re also not broken.

🌬️ Powerful but Simple Ways to Regulate Your Nervous System

You don’t need hours at a retreat or a perfect routine to feel better. Nervous system regulation can be woven into your real life.

Try:

Breathwork (more on this below!)
Grounding: Barefoot on the grass, noticing sounds or textures around you
Cold water splash: A quick way to reset when emotions spike
Gentle movement: Walks, stretching, or shaking out tension
Nourishing food and hydration: Eat ‘real food’ and drink filtered water
Digital breaks: Less scrolling = less stimulation

The goal is to find tools that help you come home to yourself—not escape your life.

🌬️ How Breathwork Can Support Mums

Your breath is the most powerful, portable tool for nervous system regulation.

When we’re stressed, our breath becomes shallow and fast, sending danger signals to the brain. Breathwork flips that response—slow, intentional breathing tells your brain: “It’s safe. You’re okay.”

Here’s how breathwork helps:

Activates the parasympathetic nervous system (rest and digest)
Reduces stress hormones like cortisol
Helps you respond with clarity instead of react from overwhelm
Improves sleep, digestion, cognitive function, and mood
Connects you back to your body, presence, and power

✨ Simple Breathwork Practices for Busy Mums

You don’t need a quiet room or 30 free minutes to start. Here are mum-approved techniques:

🟡 Box Breathing (4-4-4-4)

Inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4.

Repeat for 1-2 minutes.

🟡 Extended Exhale Breathing

Inhale for 4, exhale for 6–8.

The longer exhale activates the calming parasympathetic state.

🟡 Sigh It Out

Inhale deeply through your nose, then exhale with an open-mouth sigh.

Repeat 3–5 times to instantly reset tension.

Do it in the car, at the sink, or during nap time. It will make a difference.

🌻 You’re Not Broken—You’re Just Dysregulated

If you’ve been feeling like you can’t cope, like you’re snapping more than connecting, like you’re constantly on edge—this is your body asking for support. And it’s okay.

You are not failing. You are not too emotional. You are not broken.

You’re a mum with a dysregulated nervous system who just needs space to recalibrate.

And breathwork is a beautiful first step.

Start with one breath.

One moment of pause.

One act of care for the woman behind the “mum.”

Because when you take care of your nervous system, you’re not just doing it for yourself—you’re doing it for the whole family.

IMPORTANT NOTE:
Your body does not have an autonomic response to relax – you need to learn how to activate your parasympathetic nervous system, and breathwork is the best way to do this… and it’s free!

Stay Patient When Your Kids Push Your Limits

by Beth Lewis | Mar 5, 2025 | Beth Lewis, Self Care

Parenting is one of the most rewarding experiences, but let’s be real—it’s also one of the most testing. Whether it’s tantrums, endless “why” questions, fighting siblings, or refusing to listen, there are moments when our patience is stretched thin.

You love your kids, but that doesn’t mean you won’t feel frustrated or overwhelmed. The key isn’t to never lose patience (because let’s face it, we’re human), but rather to find ways to stay calm and respond, instead of react.

If you’re feeling like you’re one meltdown away from a meltdown yourself, here are some practical ways to keep your cool and stay patient, even when your kids are pushing your limits.

1. Take a Deep Breath (or Five!)

It sounds simple, but in the heat of the moment, taking a deep breath before reacting can make a world of difference. When we’re frustrated, our body goes into stress mode, and our brain defaults to quick, emotional reactions. Taking a breath gives you a pause—a chance to choose patience over frustration.

Try This:

Before reacting, take 5 slow, deep breaths (inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 2, exhale for 6).
Imagine yourself breathing in calm and exhaling frustration.
Walk away for a moment if needed. It’s okay to take a pause.

Patience isn’t about never feeling frustrated—it’s about learning how to manage those feelings before they take over.

2. Reframe the Situation: It’s Not Personal

When your child is having a meltdown or repeatedly ignoring instructions, it can feel like they’re intentionally testing your limits. But in most cases, they’re not trying to drive you crazy—they’re just being kids.

Try This:

Instead of thinking, Why are they doing this to me?! try asking, What’s really going on here?
Remind yourself: Your child isn’t giving you a hard time, they’re having a hard time.
Stay curious—could they be tired, hungry, overstimulated, or needing connection?

Shifting your mindset from “They’re being difficult” to “They’re struggling” helps you respond with understanding instead of frustration.

3. Lower Your Expectations (for Them & Yourself!)

Let’s be honest—sometimes our frustration comes from expecting too much from our kids. We want them to listen the first time, behave perfectly in public, and never argue. But they’re learning, growing, and testing boundaries—it’s part of childhood.

Try This:

Remind yourself of their age and stage—a toddler isn’t going to sit still for long, and a 6-year-old will struggle with emotional regulation.
Adjust your own expectations—you’re not supposed to be a perfect parent. You’re learning too!
Celebrate the small wins instead of focusing on what’s not going right.

Sometimes, just adjusting your expectations can relieve frustration before it even begins.

4. Create a “Patience Plan” for Difficult Moments

Instead of waiting until you’re already frustrated, create a simple plan for how you’ll handle challenging moments in advance.

Try This:

When your patience is running low, use a mantra like “I am calm. I am present. I’m okay.”
Have a go-to strategy—whether it’s stepping outside, counting to 10, or taking a sip of water.
If needed, remove yourself from the situation for a moment to regain composure.

Preparing ahead of time makes it easier to stay patient when emotions are high.

5. Use Humour to Diffuse Tension

Sometimes, the best way to reset a tense moment is to find the humour in it. Kids have a way of doing the most ridiculous things at the most inconvenient times. Instead of letting frustration build, lean into the chaos and laugh when you can.

Try This:

If your child is throwing a fit over something minor, try making a silly face or using a goofy voice.
Turn a frustrating situation into a game (e.g., racing to clean up toys instead of nagging).
Remind yourself: One day, you’ll probably laugh about this moment!

Not everything needs to be serious. A little humour can go a long way in keeping your patience intact.

6. Take Care of Yourself (Because Burnout = No Patience)

It’s so much harder to stay patient when you’re running on empty. If you’re constantly exhausted, overstimulated, and overwhelmed, even minor frustrations can feel impossible to handle.

Try This:

Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, food, and breaks.
Schedule 5-10 minutes of self-care daily (even if it’s just a quiet cup of tea).
Ask for help when you need it—you don’t have to do it all alone.

A well-rested, emotionally balanced mum is naturally more patient. Prioritise yourself too!

7. Repair & Apologise When You Lose Patience

Let’s be real—we all lose our patience sometimes. But what matters is how we handle it afterward.

Try This:

If you snap at your child, take a moment to calm down and apologise.
Say something like, “I got frustrated, and I’m sorry for yelling. I love you, and I’ll try to handle my emotions better next time.”
Teach your child that it’s okay to make mistakes—and how to repair them.

Apologising shows your kids that even parents have big feelings—and that love is always stronger than frustration.

Patience is a Practice, Not Perfection

Staying patient when your kids are pushing your limits isn’t always easy, but it is possible. The goal isn’t to never feel frustrated—it’s to learn how to manage those feelings before they turn into reactions you regret.

So next time you feel your patience slipping, pause, take a breath, and remind yourself: