You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup — Take Time to Recharge
I used to believe that being a good mum meant always putting my family first, making sure everyone else was happy and cared for before even thinking about myself. I’d run around all day, ticking off tasks, meeting everyone’s needs, and by the time I had a moment to breathe, I was utterly exhausted. Sound familiar?
It took me a long time to realise that constantly giving without refilling my own cup wasn’t sustainable. I was running on empty, and it showed. I was impatient, irritable, and drained. The truth is, when we don’t take care of ourselves, we have nothing left to give to those we love. You can’t pour from an empty cup.
What Does This Really Mean?
Imagine your energy and emotional well-being as a cup of water. Every time you give—whether it’s caring for your kids, supporting a friend, working, or handling daily responsibilities—you pour a little out. If you never take time to refill, your cup runs dry. And when that happens, you’re left with nothing but exhaustion and resentment.
I’ve learned that self-care isn’t a luxury or something I can push to “someday when I have more time.” It’s a necessity. When I take care of myself, I’m a more patient mum, a more present partner, and a happier version of me.
The Warning Signs of an Empty Cup
If you’re feeling any of these, it might be time to check in with yourself:
- You’re constantly exhausted, no matter how much sleep you get.
- You feel easily irritated or overwhelmed by small things.
- You struggle to enjoy the things that used to make you happy.
- You feel like you’re always giving but never receiving.
- You crave time alone but feel guilty for wanting it.
I used to ignore these signs until I reached burnout. Now, I listen to them as a gentle reminder that I need to slow down and take care of myself.
Ways to Refill Your Cup
Refilling my cup doesn’t mean taking extravagant vacations or spending hours at a spa (though I wouldn’t say no to that!). It’s about small, intentional choices that help me feel more balanced and nourished.
1. Giving Myself Permission to Rest
For the longest time, I believed that resting was lazy. Now, I see it as essential. Whether it’s taking a short nap, sitting with a cup of tea in silence, or going to bed early, I remind myself that rest is not a reward—it’s a right.
2. Saying No Without Guilt
I used to say “yes” to everything, even when it drained me. Now, I remind myself that saying no isn’t selfish—it’s setting healthy boundaries. When I say no to things that deplete me, I say yes to my well-being.
3. Finding Small Moments of Joy
Some days, self-care is as simple as drinking my coffee while it’s still hot, listening to my favourite song, or taking a few deep breaths before jumping into the next task. These little moments may seem insignificant, but they add up.
4. Moving My Body in a Way That Feels Good
Exercise used to feel like another chore, but now I focus on movement that brings me joy. Whether it’s stretching, going for a walk, or dancing in the kitchen with my kids, I move because it makes me feel good, not because I “have to.”
5. Checking in With Myself Daily
Each day, I ask myself, What do I need today? Some days, it’s connection with a friend. Other days, it’s space to be alone. Just pausing to ask this question helps me tune into my own needs.
Filling My Cup Makes Me a Better Mum
I’ve learned that taking care of myself isn’t selfish—it’s one of the best things I can do for my family. When my cup is full, I have more patience, more love, and more energy to give.
If you’re reading this and feeling like your cup is running low, I want you to know that it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes. You deserve rest. You deserve joy. You deserve to feel whole.
So today, I challenge you to do one small thing just for you. Because you can’t pour from an empty cup—and you don’t have to.
I have some wonderful resources for you to help you on your journey to better self care.
Come and join my community – MYnd Centre Facebook Community
Download my free guides – The Ultimate Self Care For Mums and How to Overcome Mum Guilt
My 1:1 Breathwork and Sound Healing session – a deeply personal, transformative experience designed to help you reconnect with your authentic self. Learn more here.